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Jokes
May 18, 2009 18:34:09 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 18, 2009 18:34:09 GMT 10
Love the pac man one my mum laughed at it and i have herd the Muslim one but its funny!
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Jokes
May 18, 2009 18:42:41 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 18, 2009 18:42:41 GMT 10
I thought so...
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Jokes
May 19, 2009 8:16:00 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 19, 2009 8:16:00 GMT 10
"...now, I know what you're thinking: That's a lot of cord-euroy for one man. Some people think I'm a supplies teacher who's wondered on to the wrong gig....It's your own time your wasting....and chewing....and a small leather patch on my elbow, and Hey, I'm ready to teach history to all the young ones....*dances*...hmm, better be careful dancing in cord-euroy, lotta heat builds up in there..."
"...when I'm in trouble, I can't help write a stiff letter. They come up to me: "Come on then, Cord-euroy," I'm like "hmm...To whom it may concern"..."
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Jokes
May 19, 2009 8:17:28 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 19, 2009 8:17:28 GMT 10
Huh? I dont get it!
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Jokes
May 19, 2009 10:24:54 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 19, 2009 10:24:54 GMT 10
Q: What don't you ask a person with arthritis for? A: A helping hand.
Q: Your 4year old wants a car, what do you get him? A: A TOYota
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Jokes
May 19, 2009 10:26:02 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 19, 2009 10:26:02 GMT 10
2 men walk into a bar...it hurt
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Jokes
May 19, 2009 10:27:28 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 19, 2009 10:27:28 GMT 10
What is Pole Vault? (besides a sport) A place to keep polish people
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Pretzel
The Rumor
Imouto of HandOfDarkness444
Posts: 433
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Jokes
May 19, 2009 13:56:39 GMT 10
Post by Pretzel on May 19, 2009 13:56:39 GMT 10
lol i love this page
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Jokes
May 19, 2009 14:22:57 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 19, 2009 14:22:57 GMT 10
LOL!
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Pretzel
The Rumor
Imouto of HandOfDarkness444
Posts: 433
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Jokes
May 20, 2009 11:35:57 GMT 10
Post by Pretzel on May 20, 2009 11:35:57 GMT 10
There are four elements of movement to and engine: Sucking fuel and air into a chamber Squeezing it to get the best explosion Making the fuel go bang and blowing the exhaust away.
so if you hear smart people discussing 'suck, squeeze, bang and blow' they're not necessarily being filthy (at least not in a sexual way- engines can get pretty grimy at times)
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Jokes
May 20, 2009 18:15:56 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 20, 2009 18:15:56 GMT 10
LOL! U told me that one!
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Jokes
May 20, 2009 18:19:50 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 20, 2009 18:19:50 GMT 10
Don't we already have this one?
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Jokes
May 20, 2009 19:02:48 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 20, 2009 19:02:48 GMT 10
I'm on a diet. I can eat as much broccoli and cauliflower as I want, it's great. I haven't had any so far
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Jokes
May 21, 2009 7:02:45 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 21, 2009 7:02:45 GMT 10
i hate broccoli and cauliflower!
Are u serious? Its great?
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Jokes
May 21, 2009 8:34:03 GMT 10
Post by The Fear/Rukia on May 21, 2009 8:34:03 GMT 10
Random Funny Thoughts
Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane.
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard
Never knock on Death's door; ring the doorbell and run (he hates that).
Lead me not into temptation (I can find the way myself)
If FED EX and UPS were to merge, would they call it FED UP?
If they arrest the Energizer bunny would they charge it with battery?
Five out of four people have trouble with fractions
If quitters never win and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while your ahead"?!
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
Why do people without a watch look at their wrist when you ask them what time it is?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Why do scientist call it "re"search when they are looking for something new?
What hair color do they put on the drivers license of bald men?
Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
Why is it that if someone tells you that there is 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint on it you will have to touch it to be sure!
A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular culling of the weakest members.
Much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells.
Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers.
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Jokes
May 21, 2009 15:03:46 GMT 10
Post by Henna, Hypo, Hippie, Hannah on May 21, 2009 15:03:46 GMT 10
What do you get if you have swine (pig) flu and bird (chicken) flu? Answer: Bacon and eggs My dada told me that one after we were talking about tomato sauce (Girls know what I'm on about )
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Pretzel
The Rumor
Imouto of HandOfDarkness444
Posts: 433
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Jokes
May 21, 2009 15:19:03 GMT 10
Post by Pretzel on May 21, 2009 15:19:03 GMT 10
why were u talking 2 your dad about tomato sauce???
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Jokes
May 21, 2009 16:35:13 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 21, 2009 16:35:13 GMT 10
There are 3 types of ppl in this world: those that can do math, and those that can't
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Jokes
May 21, 2009 19:50:31 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 21, 2009 19:50:31 GMT 10
I am guessing u cant Mr. Advance Math Dude?
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Jokes
May 21, 2009 20:18:34 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 21, 2009 20:18:34 GMT 10
I once saw a guy who was passed out, and i grabbed a razor and shaved off his eyebrows. He was very surprised, but you couldn't tell.
Women say that the best way to arouse a man is to nibble on their earlobes for hours, i think it's bollocks.
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Jokes
May 21, 2009 20:22:45 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 21, 2009 20:22:45 GMT 10
LOL! The razor one!
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Pretzel
The Rumor
Imouto of HandOfDarkness444
Posts: 433
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Jokes
May 22, 2009 12:22:28 GMT 10
Post by Pretzel on May 22, 2009 12:22:28 GMT 10
I Women say that the best way to arouse a man is to nibble on their earlobes for hours, i think it's bollocks. eewwww!! i get that one!!
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Jokes
May 22, 2009 20:26:57 GMT 10
Post by The Fear/Rukia on May 22, 2009 20:26:57 GMT 10
Subject: Un joke or une joke?
A language instructor was explaining to her class that in French, nouns unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine. For instance, "house" in French, is feminine (une maison) while "pencil" is masculine (un crayon). One student then asked her what gender the word computer (ordinateur) was. She didn't know, so she decided to split the class into to, for fun, so that they could argue for it. Both groups were required to give four reasons for their recommendation.
The men's group decided that computers should be of the feminine gender (une ordinateur), because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic and even then only partially.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for possible later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your pay check on accessories for it.
The women's group, however concluded that computers should be masculine (un ordinateur), because:
1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realise that if you'd waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.
The women won.
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Jokes
May 22, 2009 20:29:39 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 22, 2009 20:29:39 GMT 10
LOL!
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Jokes
May 22, 2009 20:30:30 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 22, 2009 20:30:30 GMT 10
Wow, that's like the harley davidson one
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Jokes
May 22, 2009 20:30:50 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 22, 2009 20:30:50 GMT 10
Yea!
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Jokes
May 22, 2009 20:38:33 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 22, 2009 20:38:33 GMT 10
I Women say that the best way to arouse a man is to nibble on their earlobes for hours, i think it's bollocks. eewwww!! i get that one!! really? Coz i just thought it was funny. Coz they say it gets men aroused, and i disagree
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Jokes
May 22, 2009 20:41:54 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 22, 2009 20:41:54 GMT 10
okay...
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Jokes
May 22, 2009 20:49:43 GMT 10
Post by HandOfDarkness444/The Blade on May 22, 2009 20:49:43 GMT 10
Q: What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A: a lick-a-lotta-pus
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Jokes
May 22, 2009 20:59:31 GMT 10
Post by Whisper My Fairytale on May 22, 2009 20:59:31 GMT 10
Okay...
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